Two Grooms: Your Wedding Planning Guide

A two grooms wedding brings its own set of practical questions that standard wedding guides were not written to answer. From coordinating two suits that look intentional without looking identical to handling the logistics of two best men, two sets of parents wanting to speak and a first dance where nobody assumes who leads, this guide covers what you actually need to know.

Same-sex marriage has been legal across the UK since 2014 in England, Wales and Scotland, and since 2020 in Northern Ireland. The legal framework is settled. What varies is how two grooms choose to shape their day within it. Some couples keep every traditional element. Others build something entirely new. Most land somewhere in the middle.

The practical reality is that a two grooms wedding costs roughly the same as any other wedding, with a few line items that shift. Suits are typically cheaper than dresses. Grooming replaces bridal hair and makeup. Stag dos may merge or double. The overall budget stays in the same range, but where the money goes changes.

How should two grooms coordinate their suits?

Getting the suits right is the single biggest style decision for a two-groom wedding. The goal is looking like you planned this together without looking like you raided the same rack.

Same colour family, different details

This is the safest and most popular approach. Both grooms in navy, but one in a three-piece and the other in a two-piece with a different lapel. Both in charcoal, but different fabrics or textures. The shared colour creates visual cohesion. The different details give each groom his own identity.

Complementary rather than matching

A bolder approach: one groom in a dark suit, the other in a lighter shade. Navy and light grey. Charcoal and tan. Black and midnight blue. This creates striking contrast in photographs and works especially well when the two grooms have different builds or colouring.

One formal, one less formal

Some couples deliberately play with formality. One groom in a classic suit and tie, the other in a more relaxed blazer with open collar. This works when the wedding itself mixes formal and casual elements. It also suits couples whose personal styles are genuinely different.

Tie coordination

Matching ties is the simplest way to signal “we are together” in photographs. Same tie, same pocket square, different suits. Alternatively, choose ties in the same fabric but different patterns. A solid navy tie on one groom and a navy paisley on the other creates a subtle link. Bow ties are popular at two-groom weddings and add a dash of personality. See our groom suit guide for more on accessories and styling.

Suit shopping: together or apart?

Unlike dress shopping for two brides, most two-groom couples shop together. The surprise element around suits tends to be less of a priority, and coordinating fit, colour and fabric is easier when you are standing next to each other in the fitting room.

Going together

Book an appointment at a tailor or menswear specialist that understands wedding suiting. Explain that you are a couple, not a groom and best man. Good tailors will already know how to dress two grooms. If they seem confused, find a different tailor. Our LGBTQ+ wedding suppliers guide lists UK businesses with proven experience.

The surprise route

If you want the reveal moment, set boundaries: agree on colour family and formality level, then shop independently. Share your notes with each tailor so the suits do not clash. Plan a first look before the ceremony to see each other’s choices.

UK suit options and pricing

Option	Price per suit	Total for two	Turnaround	Best for
Off the rack (Moss, Charles Tyrwhitt, M&S)	£150 to £600	£300 to £1,200	Same day to 2 weeks (alterations)	Budget-conscious couples, standard sizes
Made to measure (Suit Supply, Edit Suits, Cad & The Dandy)	£400 to £1,200	£800 to £2,400	4 to 6 weeks	Good fit without bespoke pricing
Bespoke (Savile Row, independent tailors)	£500 to £2,000+	£1,000 to £4,000+	8 to 12 weeks, multiple fittings	Perfect fit, unique fabric choices
Hire (Moss Hire, Slaters)	£80 to £200	£160 to £400	Pick up 1 week before	One-off wear, very tight budget

For bespoke, start the process at least four months before the wedding. You will need two to three fittings each, and good tailors book up quickly during wedding season (May to September).

Accessories and finishing touches

The details pull the whole look together. Plan these after the suits are chosen, not before.

Shoes

Matching shoes is a subtle and effective way to tie two outfits together. Polished Oxford shoes in black or brown are the classic choice. Loafers and brogues work for less formal weddings. Budget £80 to £300 per pair. Break them in before the day. Our wedding shoes guide has options for every budget and style.

Boutonnieres and buttonholes

Both grooms wear a boutonniere. Matching flowers signal unity. Different flowers in the same colour palette signal individuality within a pair. Popular choices include roses, ranunculus, thistles (a nod to Scottish weddings), and herbs like rosemary or lavender. Budget £10 to £30 each from your florist.

Cufflinks and watches

Matching cufflinks are a popular gift that grooms exchange on the morning of the wedding. Engraved initials, wedding dates, or coordinates of your first date are all meaningful options. Budget £30 to £200 per pair depending on material.

A shared watch brand or style is another way to coordinate. This is not about spending thousands. Two matching Seiko Presage watches at around £300 each or two Daniel Wellington watches at £150 each create a lasting reminder.

Pocket squares

If your suits match, use pocket squares to differentiate. If your suits contrast, matching pocket squares pull the look together. The fold style matters too: a simple flat fold for formal weddings, a puffed fold for relaxed ones.

Getting ready: together or apart?

Most two-groom couples get ready in the same room. The atmosphere tends to be relaxed, music-filled and sociable. Unlike two-bride weddings where dress secrecy often demands separate spaces, two-groom mornings usually feel like a gathering of friends who happen to be putting on very nice suits.

If you want the surprise element, book two rooms. Have your best men coordinate timings so you both finish at the same time.

Best man duties times two

Two grooms means two best men (or best people). Divide the responsibilities clearly. One best man handles the rings. The other manages the morning logistics. Both give speeches, but set a time limit of five minutes each to keep the reception moving.

Some couples assign different duties entirely: one best man as morning coordinator and speech giver, the other as evening MC and dance floor hype person. Talk about this early so nobody treads on anyone’s toes.

Stag do: joint or separate?

The stag do question for two-groom couples is less fraught than the hen do equivalent, largely because stag culture tends to be flexible about group size and format.

Joint stag do

The most popular choice. Both friend groups merge for a weekend away, an activity day, or a night out. This works especially well when you have overlapping social circles. Popular UK options include brewery tours, karting, paintball, hiking weekends in the Lake District or Snowdonia, and city breaks to Edinburgh, Manchester or Brighton. Our stag do ideas guide covers dozens of options.

Separate stag dos

If your friend groups are distinct or you want a night that is specifically about you and your mates, separate events work perfectly. Set an informal budget cap so one stag does not become significantly more expensive than the other.

The “stag and stag” hybrid

One shared daytime activity (e.g. go-karting, whisky tasting, escape room) followed by separate evening plans. Everyone gets time together and time apart. This is the best compromise for couples with large, separate friend groups.

Walking down the aisle as two grooms

The aisle question for two grooms is identical to the options available to any same-sex couple, but the most popular choices differ slightly.

Both already at the front

The most common choice for two-groom couples. You are both standing at the front when guests are seated. The ceremony begins without an entrance. This is simple, relaxed and removes the question entirely.

Walking in together

Both grooms walk down the aisle side by side. Some couples bring their mothers, fathers, or both parents. Others walk alone. This creates a strong visual moment and works well when you want a traditional entrance without deciding who waits.

Entering separately

One groom enters first, takes his position, and the second follows. This builds anticipation and gives each groom his own moment. If you choose this, decide the order together. Some couples flip a coin. Others give the entrance to whoever wants it more.

For a full breakdown of ceremony options including readings and vow ideas, see our LGBTQ+ wedding readings and vows guide.

Who stands where at the altar?

As with a two-bride wedding, there is no convention for two grooms. Stand wherever feels comfortable. Some couples choose based on their family’s seating side. Others pick based on which hand they want free for the ring exchange. Your officiant may suggest positions based on the venue layout.

If you are exchanging rings, consider which hand you write with. It helps to have your dominant hand free for sliding the ring onto your partner’s finger.

Speeches: managing a bigger line-up

Two grooms typically means more people want to speak. Without a clear traditional format (father of the bride, best man, groom), you need to create your own structure.

A suggested running order

Order	Speaker	Time limit	Content
1	Best man 1	5 minutes	Stories and toast for Groom 1
2	Best man 2	5 minutes	Stories and toast for Groom 2
3	Parent (Groom 1’s side)	3 to 5 minutes	Welcome, memories, advice
4	Parent (Groom 2’s side)	3 to 5 minutes	Welcome, memories, advice
5	Both grooms (joint speech)	5 to 7 minutes	Thank-yous, stories, toast to guests

Total speech time: 25 to 30 minutes. Any longer and guests start checking their phones. Brief your MC on timings and give speakers a friendly but firm time limit.

For writing tips and templates, see our best man speech examples and how to write a wedding speech guides. Our maid of honour speech guide is also useful if one of your attendants is not a man.

The first dance

The first dance at a two-groom wedding is often the moment that surprises guests the most, largely because there is no assumed choreography. That is an advantage.

Leading and following

You can decide in advance who leads, switch halfway through, or skip the formal hold entirely and dance freestyle. Many couples take a few dance lessons to feel confident. Two or three sessions at £40 to £60 each is enough to learn basic moves and a simple spin.

Song choices

Choose a song that means something to your relationship rather than a “wedding” song. Two grooms tend to pick songs with lyrics that feel authentic rather than traditionally romantic. George Michael, Elton John, Sam Smith, and Hozier are popular choices, but do not feel limited to LGBTQ+ artists. A song is a song. Our first dance songs guide lists popular options across every genre.

Who dips whom?

If you want a dip for the finale, practise it. The taller or stronger partner usually dips, but height is not a requirement. Two mutual dips in quick succession always get a cheer. Or skip the dip entirely. It is not compulsory.

Cost comparison: traditional wedding vs two-groom wedding

A two-groom wedding often costs slightly less than a traditional wedding due to lower outfit and beauty costs. Here is where the numbers shift.

Budget item	Traditional (one groom, one bride)	Two grooms	Difference
Outfits	£1,300 (dress) + £500 (suit) = £1,800	£500 + £500 = £1,000	-£800
Alterations	£200 (dress) + £50 (suit) = £250	£50 + £50 = £100	-£150
Hair and makeup	£350 (bridal) + £0 (groom) = £350	£80 + £80 = £160	-£190
Flowers	£150 (bouquet) + £15 (buttonhole) = £165	£15 + £15 = £30	-£135
Accessories	£200 (bride) + £100 (groom) = £300	£150 + £150 = £300	No change
Stag/hen do	£300 + £300 = £600	£300 to £600	-£0 to £300
Venue	£5,000	£5,000	No change
Catering	£4,500	£4,500	No change
Photography	£1,500	£1,500	No change
Estimated total difference			-£975 to -£1,275

The saving comes from suits being cheaper than dresses, minimal hair and makeup costs, and boutonnieres costing a fraction of bridal bouquets. The overall budget for a two-groom wedding lands around £18,000 to £20,000 against the UK average of £20,000 to £22,000. Use our wedding budgeting guide to plan your numbers.

Grooming timeline for two grooms

Looking your best on the day starts weeks before, not on the morning of the wedding.

Timeframe	Task	Details
3 months before	Start a skincare routine	Cleanser, moisturiser, SPF. Nothing complicated. Consistency matters more than product cost.
2 months before	Trial haircut	Get the style you want and let it grow out slightly to see how it settles.
1 month before	Final haircut	Two weeks before is too close (looks freshly cut in photos), one month allows it to relax into shape.
2 weeks before	Beard trim or shave plan	If you have facial hair, decide on the final shape. Get a professional barber trim to set the lines.
1 week before	Teeth whitening (optional)	Over-the-counter strips or a quick professional session. Do not try anything new closer to the day.
Morning of	Shower, moisturise, style hair	Keep it simple. No new products on the day. Use what you know works.

Budget around £50 to £150 per groom for pre-wedding grooming (haircuts, skincare, barber visits). This is a fraction of the bridal beauty spend and makes a noticeable difference in photographs.

Practical logistics for two-groom weddings

Small details that keep the day running smoothly.

Changing rooms. If you are getting ready separately, confirm two rooms with your venue. If you are getting ready together, one room works. Most venues accommodate this without issue.

Ring sizing. Get both rings sized professionally at least six weeks before the wedding. Fingers swell in warm weather, so if you are marrying in summer, size slightly larger. Budget £200 to £600 per ring for plain bands, more for diamond or engraved designs.

Name changes. The process is identical to any married couple. You can keep your own names, one partner takes the other’s name, you double-barrel, or you both choose something new. Apply for updated documents within six weeks of the wedding using your marriage certificate.

Guest assumptions. Some guests will ask “who is the groom?” without thinking. Your MC can set the tone early by using your names throughout and avoiding “the happy couple” cliches. Brief family members who might field questions.

Gendered stationery. Standard wedding stationery still defaults to “Mr and Mrs” in many shops. Order from suppliers who offer gender-neutral wording or custom text. Online printers like Papier, Minted and Vistaprint all support custom wording. Our wedding stationery guide covers the full process.

What real two-groom couples wish they had known

Order suits earlier than you think, especially bespoke. Eight to twelve weeks is the minimum turnaround, and wedding season (May to September) creates backlogs at popular tailors. Start by January for a summer wedding.

Do not overthink the “who does what” question. In a two-groom wedding, every decision is shared. If one of you cares more about flowers and the other about music, divide the planning by interest rather than by tradition.

Set expectations with family early. Parents may have questions about the ceremony format, the speech order, or their role in the day. A casual conversation three to four months out prevents last-minute surprises. If family dynamics are complicated, our LGBTQ+ wedding planning guide has advice on navigating those conversations.

Hire a photographer who has shot two-groom weddings before. The framing, the posing and the timing are different when both partners are in suits. Ask to see full galleries, not just single highlight images. Our guide on choosing a wedding photographer explains what to look for.

Write personal wedding vows. Standard vows are perfectly fine, but personal words at a two-groom ceremony carry real weight. You do not need to be a writer. Speak honestly about what your partner means to you and the room will be in tears.

Further reading

• LGBTQ+ Wedding Planning Guide for the full planning timeline and legal steps
• Same-Sex Wedding Traditions and Ideas for ceremony and reception inspiration
• Two Brides: Your Wedding Planning Guide for the equivalent guide for two-bride couples
• LGBTQ+ Wedding Readings and Vows for ceremony wording that fits
• Civil Partnership vs Marriage UK if you are weighing up your legal options
• Gay-Friendly Wedding Venues UK for venue ideas across the country